lizardmania!

It is the end of 2009! Not just the end of a year, but the end of the aughts (that's what they'll call them!)! That means it's time for lists! Lists separating the mildly entertaining from the oozing, crusticulating sludge of everything else, lists allowing me to needlessly ranking stuff, lists showing how cool I am by what I like! Lists for the whole decade are way too hard for me, cuz I can't remember that far back. Also, I don't really know when this year started relative to stuff that happened, and I'm rather behind on the pop culture ... so, yeah, these are lists of stuff Yours Truly thought about today! That is highly relevant!

Lisztomania! Think less but see it grow!

Best Albums Newish to Kristin in '09.
So this thing called the internet and its free streaming music has really changed the availability of full albums to a frugal bugle like myself. Many of the albums that have gotten heavy play from me on the imeem are not from this year. Here are my favorite newish to me albums of the year:

1. In the Aeroplane Over the Sea by Neutral Milk Hotel
2. Transformer by Lou Reed, The Velvet Underground & Nico by The Velvet Underground & Nico
   
3. Lots of David Bowie albums.
   
4. London Calling by The Clash
   
5. Yankee Hotel Foxtrot by Wilco
6. Unknown Pleasures, Closer by Joy Division
   
7. I Can Hear the Heart Beating As One, And Then Nothing Turned Itself Inside Out, and I Am Not Afraid of You and I Will Beat Your Ass by Yo La Tengo
   
8. Bows + Arrows and You and Me by The Walkmen
9. Funeral and Neon Bible by The Arcade Fire
10. New Moon by Elliott Smith (unfortunately named for this year)
    
11. Fleet Foxes by Fleet Foxes
12. Dark Night of the Soul by Danger Mouse, Sparklehorse, David Lynch, ...
    
13. Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix by Phoenix
    
14. The Crane Wife and The Hazards of Love by The Decemberists
15. Lots of albums by Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds
16. Marry Me and Actor by St. Vincent
    
17. The Moon & Antarctica by Modest Mouse
18. Another Green World by Brian Eno
    
19. Ocean Songs by Dirty Three
    
20. Narrow Stairs by Death Cab
21. Merriweather Post Pavillion by Animal Collective
    
22. Travels with Myself and Another by Future of the Left
23. Far by Regina Spektor

Anyways, these are ones I can think of by going through my saved imeem playlists. I'm a bit disturbed by the fact that (a) most of these albums are not from '09 and (b) I'm 30 years old now. In conclusion, though, imeem is awesome. I don't know why you don't use it, and how it makes money (or does not lose too much money), but you should use it while it still exists. Also, Pandora sucks. Also, honorable mentions go to all the Queen live performances on Youtube. There's a lotta good old music stuffs on Youtube.

Best Movies of '09.
Again, being a cheapo/lazo, we rent movies instead of seeing them in the theater. Even tho there is a $2 theater 2 blocks from my house. Here are some recent movies I liked that I saw this year.

1. Synecdoche, NY
2. The Unbearable Lightness of Being
   
3. Tokyo!
4. Step Brothers
   
5. I Love You, Man & Role Models
6. Frost/Nixon
   
7. New Star Trek

It was apparently not a good year for movies to me.

Best TV Shows Newish to Kristin of '09.
Same as above. Internet and Netflix are awesome.

1. Arrested Development
2. The Daily Show
3. The Colbert Report
   
4. 30 Rock
5. Spaced
6. Twin Peaks (Seasons 1-2.25)
7. Extras
8. Pole to Pole
   
9. This American Life the TV show
   

Best Books Kristin Read on '09.

1. 1984 (re-re-read)
   
2. Oracle Bones
3. River Town
4. Wind-Up Bird Chronicles
5. When You Are Engulfed in Flames

Best Emoticons.
This year, the part of me that thinks smiley faces and exclamation points are childish and gag-inducing lost to the part of me that feels that they are totally totally necessary. Because no one can tell if you're being sarcastic in writing without them! I am not the only one to say this. The irony mark was first proposed in the 19th century by some French guy.

1. :)
2. :(
   
3. :P

I do not approve of any other emoticons, particularly variants of the above with o's for noses. Noses are completely unnecessary in emoticons.



Best Wilson Bros.
I was reminded of the Wilson bros by the letter Mr. Steely Dan sent to Regular Wilson re Nose Wilson's appearance in the movie You, Me, and Dupree, or whatever it was called. The letter made it to the Letters of Note blog yesterday.

1. Owen "Nose" Wilson
2. Luke "Regular" "Chunky" Wilson
3. "Frankenstein" Wilson
4. Wes Anderson
   

I do not know Frankenstein Wilson's real name. He is the one who is not Owen or Luke. Or Wes, I guess.



Best Web Portals Right (to Me this Minute)
"Web portal" was used to describe MSN on a Trivial Pursuit question. I'm assuming that means it's the correct all-encompassing term. These are hard to sort.

1. The New York Times
2. Youtube
   
3. The New Yorker
4. The Atlantic
   
5. imeem
   
6. Videogum
7. The Awl
8. A Journey Around My Skull
9. Bibliodyssey
   
10. The Daily Dish
11. The AV Club
12. The Daily What
13. Vimeo
    
14. The Cynical-C Blog
    
15. The Fail Blog
16. Everything Is Terrible
17. The Loom
18. The Cartoon Lounge
    
19. Buzzfeed
20. Flavorwire
    
21. J-Walk
22. Gawker
23. Ta-Nehisi Coates
    
24. Lifehacker
25. Pink Tentacle
26. Dangerous Minds
27. hunch.net
    

Favorite Podcasts/Radio Shows.

1. This American Life
2. Radiolab
3. Morning Becomes Eclectic
   

Best stuff to put in coffee

1. Sugar
2. Heavy whipping cream
3. Half & half
4. Whipped cream
5. Chocolate
6. Little marshmallows

Best foods to put on other foods

1. Sugar
2. Butter
3. Salt
4. Bacon
5. Chocolate chips
6. Frosting
7. Cheese
8. Eggs
9. French fries
10. Little marshmallows
11. Mustard
    

In case you are curious, nuts are not good on anything.

[Bacon Ice Cream, from The Eaten Path]

Best Queen Songs

1. Under Pressure
2. Bohemian Rhapsody
3. March of the Black Queen
4. Keep Yourself Alive
5. Don't Stop Me Now
6. The Fairy Feller's Master Stroke
7. Radio Gaga (live version only)
8. Somebody to Love
9. Death on Two Legs
10. We Are the Champions
11. Bicycle Race
12. Millionaire Waltz
13. Seaside Rendez-vous
14. '39
15. Lazing on a Sunday Afternoon
16. The Show Must Go On
17. All Dead, All Dead (cuz it's about a dead pet cat)
18. Tie Your Mother Down
19. Ogre Battle

Best Beatles
Whatever best means.

1. George
2. Ringo
3. John
4. Paul

Most Talented Beatles

1. John
2. Paul
3. George Harrison
4. George Martin
5. Ringo

Pete Best is the worst. Get it? Cuz his name is Best. Also, he really is the worst. I'm guessing. I know nothing about him.



Ex-Beatle with the best post-Beatles solo career

1. John
2. George

John and George are kind of in a tie. It is hard to compare, as one had a much longer post-Beatles career than the other. The others do not make the list. What happened to you, Paul?

[The Beatles :: After the Break-Up -- The Singles from Aquarium Drunkard]

Best Beatles Songs.
I am probably missing many.

1. Abbey Road Medley: You Never Give Me Your Money + Sun King + Mean Mr. Mustart + Polythene Pam + She Came in Through the Bathroom Window + Golden Slumbers + Carry That Weight + The End
2. Happiness is a Warm Gun
3. A Day in the Life
4. Strawberry Fields Forever
5. Helter Skelter
6. Sexy Sadie
7. I Will
8. Norwegian Wood
9. And Your Bird Can Sing
10. In My Life
11. Come Together
12. Something
13. Everybody's Got Something to Hide Cept for Me and My Monkey
14. I Want You (She's So Heavy)
15. Oh Darling
16. Yellow Submarine
17. Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds
18. Got to Get You into My Life
19. While My Guitar Gently Weeps
20. All You Need Is Love
21. I Am the Walrus

Best Ice Cream Flavors.
Some of these are distant memories, as we still avoid buying the slave chocolate.

1. Chocolate Fudge Brownie
2. Chocolate with M&Ms
3. Mint Chip
4. Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough
5. Coffee + chocolate chips
6. Chocolate peanut butter cup
7. Cookies and Cream
8. Cotton candy
9. Cake batter
10. Pralines and cream
11. Strawberry

Best Insults

1. So's your face.
2. You, sir, have the boorish manners of a Yalie.
   
3. Shut up you face.
4. Where's your messiah now?
5. You are a bad son-montel.
   
6. Lady Nancy Astor: Winston, if I were your wife, I’d poison your tea.
   Winston Churchill: Nancy, if I were your husband, I’d drink it.
7. Bessie Braddock: Sir, you are drunk.
   Winston Churchill: And you, madam, are ugly. But in the morning, I shall be sober.
8. You need to study your grammar, son.
9. If you gave Falwell an enema, you could have buried him in a matchbox.

Best Colas

1. Royal Crown "RC" Cola
2. Pepsi
3. Coca-Cola

Best I'm-Awesome Interjections in Web Writing. Yeah.

1. Anyways.
2. So.
3. Yeah.
4. Okay.
5. Yup.
6. Sigh.
7. Meta.
   
8. Whatever.

Stupidest Things That Happened This Year

1. Sarah Palin
2. Glenn Beck
3. Orly Taitz & the Birther Movement
4. Rob Blagojevich
   
5. Everything on the FAIL Blog
6. Autotuning.
   
7. The source of this video.
   
8. Kid not kicking a ball, Baby not hula hooping
9. Sleepwalking dog
10. FIFA decision to have no replay/extra refs in World Cup
11. Nicolas Cage